Never Trust A Fangirl

"Are you ready?" Madison asked Minniiee as the two snuck backstage.

The other girl nodded. "Don't forget, do the biggest puppy dog eyes you can, ok? They won't be able to resist."

Maddy grinned. "Never trust a Rammstein slash fangirl; you never know what she's going to do to you…"

Minniiee laughed as the two found their way onto the stage. The show was now over and the band was packing away.

"Hi," the two girls said in unison.

The six males looked up, surprised. "Hi…"

"How… How'd you manage to get here?" Richard asked after a slight pause.

Maddy shrugged, "Magic powers. Never underestimate a fangirl."

Paul chuckled, coming up to them. "Magic powers, eh?" He looked at the two. "What number am I thinking of?"

"9842," Minniiee replied instantly.

Paul nodded, grinning. "Close enough. That proves it Rich, they do have powers…"

Richard shook his head slightly at Paul but couldn't help smiling. Paul's smile was contagious. "So, do you need us to sign something?"

The two girls exchanged glances. "Well, not exactly…" Maddy began.

"We want… wait, no, we need for you and Paul to kiss," Minniiee finished promptly.

Richard's eyebrows shot up. "Excuse me?!"

"You two always do those teaser things in shows and videos. You know, the shoulder kisses or the intense 'I-want-to-make-out-with-you' stares in your video clips," Maddy began. "And us fangirls cannot take the teasing any more…"

"So on behalf of fangirls everywhere," Minniiee put in, "we need you to kiss."

Richard blinked, not believing his ears. "You're serious?"

The girls nodded in unison. "Absolutely. You must. Either you and Paul. Or you and Till. Or Paul and Schneider. Or Paul and Olli. Or all of the above," they replied seriously, each saying a couple.

They noticed that Flake had mysteriously disappeared, though Maddy suspected he was hiding to save himself from kissing someone.

"Please…" they pleaded, making their eyes round and pulling off the most perfect puppy dog look.

"Naww, look at them," Schneider put in. "They look like Puss-in-Boots. Except female. And human. Richard how can you resist?"

"No! Your cute charms won't work on me!" Richard yelped, attempting to look away.

The girls went either side of him and made their eyes even wider. "Please…"

Paul went up behind them, putting his arms around their shoulders. "How can you say no to cute-ness like this?"

"Gah, I give up!" Richard exclaimed. "C'mere." He grabbed Paul by the front of his shirt, pulling him over and kissing him.

Till, Schneider and Olli covered their ears as the squeals erupted. As the pair broke apart, Maddy's and Minniiee's eyes grew wide. "We didn't say stop!"

Maddy grabbed Paul and dragged him over to Schneider, while at the same moment Minniee dragged Richard over to Till. "Kiss!" the two commanded before erupting into squeals over the cute hotness of the kissing Rammstein guys.

Sinister music began to play just as the four broke apart. As the males turned to look at their two fans, their eyes grew wide. The girls had transformed into bloody slash-fangirl-supernatural-beings.

"And now, dear members of Rammstein," Maddy began. "In the name of people, and fangirls, and freedom, and democracy, and stuff like that, we hereby kidnap you!"

"And we're taking your tour bus with us! Whoo!" Minniiee added happily, producing a coil of rope and giving an evil giggle. "Rammstein are now all ours for the taking!"

"And what the hell are you planning on doing with us?!" Till demanded as the girls dragged the band members onto the bus using their insane fangirl strength.

"Well, we plan on making a zillion slash movies and becoming famous while trying not to die from cuteness and hotness overdose," Minniiee replied. "Comfortable dear sir?" Till grumbled a 'yes'.

"Excellent. And also we request that you play us concerts every week or so," Maddy added as she got behind the wheel of the bus. "Don't worry, your new home will be perfectly comfortable."

"Maddy wouldn't let me keep you guys in a ginormous basement cellar thing," Minniiee grumbled. "So we got a house built for you. Totally inescapable, but totally comfy."

"Onwards!" Maddy gave an evil laugh, speeding off into the sunset.

Nose-bleeds and fainting became a common occurrence in the house, but Richard and Schneider became CPR experts and so everyone lived happily and slash-ily ever after.